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Hoaxes

Navel Lint Industry Booming Across Southern States – Bankrolls Teabagger Movement

Courtesy of Flickr via Wikipedia

According to The National Cotton Council of America, the U.S. cotton industry has suffered severe economic setbacks from lowered prices arising from increased global production of the natural fiber. Climate change and the unpredictable inclement weather nationwide has also affected the wildly vacillating production of pounds of cotton per acre, making for unstable pricing per bale from year to year.  Additionally, the removal of quotas has created a highly competitive global market. Sustainability must also be considered when it takes over 700 gallons of water to produce one cotton T-shirt alone. Perhaps we are witnessing the unravelling of a historically contentious and ecologically unsound crop.

Ironically, we are also witnessing the rise of a grassroots cottage industry that seems to be booming where the cotton industry first took foothold in the U.S. during the early days of slavery – navel lint-wear. Fueled by rising unemployment and discontent with the current administration in the White House, white Southerners are gathering their rosebuds and collecting their belly button lint for a resilient recycled thread. The accumulation of the fluffy fibers from the navels of couch potatoes from Maryland to Texas are being collected and reworked into a cost-effective and ecologically friendly cloth. Since dead skin cells or collagen are also included in the mix of belly button lint,  a curiously stronger thread – not unlike a 50-50 polyester thread – is being produced for pennies a bale. Some reports claim that highly hirsute southern males are able to produce over 6 mg of lint hourly. Gossypium aside, this booming industry may be providing the funds that bank-roll the Teabagger Movement nationwide. Contemplate that!

Put Some Polka Dots On It - blogspot

New technologies for extracting navel lint also increases capital for the booming industry.

Gossypium hirsutum – Wikipedia

Go Obama! Union City, NJ

J.F.Kennedy Blvd - © Frank H. Jump

J.F.Kennedy Blvd - © Frank H. Jump

Faux Wheatpaste Ads – Myrtle Avenue – May 2004

Half-Hearted Handshake

Bottle of Hurt
© Frank H. Jump

April Fools: Shaky Franky & Blinky Mimi

Shaky Franky

Another False Memory – West 107th Street & Broadway

False Memory - Olympia Theatre
© Frank H. Jump

Broadway & West 107th Street
Upper West Side, Manhattan

– taken December, 2002

False Memories II

Olympia Theatre.

This False Memory has an interesting story. I had heard about this sign from my friend Linda Bahoritsch who lives around the block from it. It is the winter of 2002. I’m standing on West 107th and Broadway, peering down an alleyway trying to figure out how to get the best photograph of this fading sign through a chain link fence. There was snow on the ground and a huge dumpster was blocking the view. Nearby I saw a police barricade which I quickly dismantled from its horse and started shoving under the fence to move the dumpster away from my nostalgic subject. Vincenzo waited patiently in the car. When the dumpster was pushed far enough away from my line of focus, I wedged the blue wooden plank under one of the casters so it wouldn’t roll back into view.
At this point, a Puerto Rican building superintendent from a nearby six story walkup shouted out to me, “Great thing what you are doing. That’s history!” He obviously figured out my plan. Almost immediately afterwards, an erudite Upper-West Side Jewish woman in her late fifties exclaimed:
“It’s a fake. They painted it a couple of years ago for that movie about Orson Welles- what was his name again? You know him- Susan Sarandon’s husband? Oh yeah- Tom Robbins. No Tim! Yeah. What the hell was the name of that movie again? The Hand That Rocks?… no, no, THE CRADLE WILL ROCK! That’s it. Yeah. It’s a fake. But you may as well take a picture of it anyway. They’re tearing the building down next week.”
Hence- the false memory.

PREVIOUS FALSE MEMORY

Life On Mars – Rodin – NASA – Bowie – Streisand? – Nothing Beats the Original

NASA Mars Panorama
NASA Pic – UK Register Coverage

Looks more like “art” on Mars.

CLICK FOR YOUTUBE LINK
David Bowie – Life On Mars?

After all these years I’ve finally come to realize all the make-up was to distract you from his horrible teeth! Still a brilliant song after all these years.


Life on Mars? Hunky Dory 1971 (David Bowie)

Life On Mars, Bowie single

It’s a God awful small affair
To the girl with the mousey hair
But her mummy is yelling, “No!”
And her daddy has told her to go
But her friend is no where to be seen
Now she walks through her sunken dream
To the seats with the clearest view
And she’s hooked to the silver screen
But the film is a sadd’ning bore
For she’s lived it ten times or more
She could spit in the eyes of fools
As they ask her to focus on

Sailors
Fighting in the dance hall
Oh man!
Look at those cavemen go
It’s the freakiest show
Take a look at the lawman
Beating up the wrong guy
Oh man!
Wonder if he’ll ever know
He’s in the best selling show
Is there life on Mars?

It’s on America’s tortured brow
That Mickey Mouse has grown up a cow
Now the workers have struck for fame
‘Cause Lennon’s on sale again
See the mice in their million hordes
From Ibiza to the Norfolk Broads
Rule Britannia is out of bounds
To my mother, my dog, and clowns
But the film is a sadd’ning bore
‘Cause I wrote it ten times or more
It’s about to be writ again
As I ask you to focus on

Sailors
Fighting in the dance hall
Oh man!
Look at those cavemen go
It’s the freakiest show
Take a look at the lawman
Beating up the wrong guy
Oh man!
Wonder if he’ll ever know
He’s in the best selling show
Is there life on Mars?


By far, the worst remake of Life On Mars – is Barbra Streisand’s version on Butterfly 1974- which is also one of the worst album covers. Uninspired and misdirected, it’s not even butter- it’s margarine! And not even FLIES will eat that! Neither will life on Mars. I won’t buy either of them.

More on Dumbledore

“Poor Dumbledore” – Dan Abrams, MSNBC

“Don’t these professional Christians have something to do during the day?”
George Carlin on Keith Olbermann’s Countdown, MSNBC

Pope: Hell Is a Real Place Where Sinners Burn in Everlasting Fire

fox.news

Benedict

Other irrational evidence. The “Truth” About Hell.

Darfur Genocide – U.S. Commemorative Stamp


©oncept: Frank H. Jump image © Benjamin Lowy @ Bob Cesca’s Blog

* blognotes

* Terry Glavin takes quite a drubbing

The Happy Endings Foundation (THEF) a Hoax

Lemony Snickets

Happy Endings

The Happy Endings Foundation, campaigning parents planning to burn children’s books with grisly endings, a hoax?

© Debbie Ridpath Ohi

© Inkygirl